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a
(probably not) brief (enough) interjection by
your editor, Larry "Fuzz-O" Dolman
As Mr. Phat-ass said, he is a friend of mine,
and "El Depresso Musico" is his column,
and I like his column, lots, so he can write what
he wants, but anytime Radiohead gets any praise
in Blastitude it's gonna have to be followed by
a rebuttal. Why? Because I can't stand Radiohead,
and just because only about six other people in
the world agree with me doesn't mean that we're
wrong. It just means that the power of hype is
stronger than ever; now it's even inflicting otherwise
intelligent people. And don't think this is just
knee-jerk anti-hype posturing, because I've actually
tried to like Radiohead. Certain people I trust
were smitten by OK Computer, so I figured
I might be too, but with the exception of the
song "Paranoid Android," it's just dismal.
It's probably supposed to be dismal, in the sad-sack
singer-songwriter sense, but it's also dismal
in a way that I'm sure wasn't intentional: it's
just plain dull. Thom Yorke's voice is a monochromatic
instrument, and his plodding songwriting doesn't
help. What's more, I never get the sense that
a 'band' is behind this music. I never hear a
personality in the guitar playing, the drumming,
the bass playing -- is there even a bass player
in Radiohead? Do the guys who pose in the glossy
magazine pictures next to Thom Yorke even come
to the studio? Well, I'm sure they do, but I never
feel like what I'm hearing is music being bounced,
in real time, from one musician's soul to the
next and back again, the way you can hear it being
bounced on another Brit-pop album, Verve's A
Storm In Heaven.
And now there's Kid A,
which I'll admit, seemed like it was gonna change
my mind about this band. The first song I heard
on the college station here in town impressed
me. It's the one Mr. Phat-ass quotes above, "if
you try your best" and so on. It struck me
as their best song since "Paranoid Android."
Then I heard another song and was impressed by
the Fender Rhodes keyboard tones. Then I heard
another song, and I was like "Oh, this is
Aphex Twin, I have this album," and then
lo and behold Thom Yorke started singing and I
realized it was Radiohead, and that their "originality"
isn't all that original. And then Thom got to
the chorus, which went "Ice age comin', Ice
age comin," over and over again, which just
turned me off, 'cause it was more of that monotonous
dreariness that is supposed to be oh so 'heavy.'
So Yorke lives in London and he's read Margaret
Drabble. I live in Lincoln fucking Nebraska and
I'm still not impressed.
I'll admit that Kid A is the best Radiohead
album. But it still has no soul, and, for as hard
as they're trying, not a whole lot of surprise
either. When I listen to music, I like to not
know what the fuck is going on. I want it to be
mysterious, I want to not understand what's happening,
I want the same track to never sound the same
way twice. I never want to be able to count the
measures and go "okay, I'll bet they change...HERE."
And that doesn't mean I can only listen to song-free
noise and improv music, because Bob Dylan is just
as mysterious and confounding when he sings simple
folk songs. Sure, Radiohead make music that sounds
cool, stunning, cutting-edge, etc.(especially
if you've never heard Aphex Twin), and sure Thom
Yorke is a "good songwriter" (which
is a defense I've heard a hundred times for these
guys, as if all you had to do to make good music
was string a certain number of bland verses and
choruses together), but where's the mystery? Is
there anything to get lost in? I can get lost
in "Paranoid Android," but all the other
songs just plod along. When Yorke starts singing
"Ice age comin'...Ice age comin'..."
I can tell he's going to repeat the phrase either
4 times (if he wants to be short-attention-span
poppy), 8 times (if he wants to be trance-inducing),
or 12 times (if he wants to be avant-garde). The
thing that bothers me the most is that the most
adventurous people I know are hearing Radiohead
and thinking "That's it, I've climbed Everest.
I've heard the most creative rock band working
today. You can't get any more challenging than
this. And it's still pop music! I'm so lucky,
I'm intelligent and I'm daring, but I can still
appreciate good songwriting when I hear it. Radiohead
gives me the best of all worlds. I can rest now."
Yeah, well, if they like to be challenged, why
don't they listen to the Sun City Girls too? And
The Soft Bulletin by The Flaming Lips is
so much better than all Radiohead albums put together
that it almost makes me cry. Okay, I'll stop ranting
so I can just go and cry. While listening to The
Soft Bulletin.
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